7-17-07 Gabriel

The Return of Gabriel

I was biking and got a phone call. It was my father telling me to hurry my ass because it’s going to pour massively. I started to gun it, looking upon the sky in fear of a vast storm. It started to rain with baseball size raindrops, each drop feeling as if a concussion was inevitable. I struggled to bike in the city with puddles and floods everywhere. I go into a safe home. The spiral staircase was full of people waiting for the violent storm to end. I waited by the window. The power went out and we stood there in silence.

I soon jumped out of the window onto my boat. I met up with my apparent girl, Kiera Knightley. We were chillin and shit. Then a fleet of boats surrounded me. I ordered cannons shoot in all directions…. We got fucked up BAD. All but Kiera, Cody, and I died. Cody is this little stalker dude that wants Kiera bad but is very loyal to me.

I woke up in the hospital and realized I need to give up the life of piracy. I decided to go to see a house to purchase. Toni and Pete decided to join me for the hell of it. I thought it was awkward because Pete wore his leather coat in 90 degree weather. We circled the house. The Puerto Rican real estate agent was talking about how she looks cute in strip malls, I think I could assume her 2^nd job.

We walked to the corner past a Hawaiian smoothie restaurant and saw this guy who looks kind of familiar. Then I saw Cody working at that restaurant, and he gave me the come here look. I dined there and he slipped me a note. “Gabriel’s back.” Realizing the crappiness of this possibility, I quickly started to think. Gabriel was Kiera’s ex who tried to kill us with highly technological techniques on the sea. I whooped his ass and left him at some island. I decided I am just going to go up to him and deck him. Pete and Toni said they had my back. We got up and approached the tall, curly hair white guy with a green suit on. I swung at him and moved his chin a fraction of an inch. I thought to myself, ‘did I just punch the wrong guy?’ He said, “Long time no see Parth.” And roundhouse kicked my ass into the floor. I got up and saw Pete get fucked up and Toni on the floor in the same position as me. I got up and he started to explain his story.

Apparently he was devastated by the loss of the hot girl totally out of league to a dude who just didn’t give a shit about anything or anyone. After I broke 13 of his bones and he got all fixed in the hospital, he went to Japan to look for answers. He went to this dojo and he realized his answer was revenge. He trained martial arts heavily for 4 years. And now he was back, as a manager of a Hawaiian restaurant, made of bamboo sticks, to kill me. I went to stab him and as he went to block it, I threw my gun at Toni who caught it and shot Gabrielle in the leg, but he barely flinched. Out of nowhere, the Yatta song started to play and we all stopped fighting and danced the yatta song dance. Pete grew out of his unconscious state and he started dancing. I said “How the hell are you getting us to do this?” Gabriel said, “This isn’t my doing.”

…… my phone went off with the song yatta playing as the ringtone for the Stanzione