I was driving on a street and hit traffic, people were getting out of their cars and running.
I get out of my car and noticed there was a shootout between the cops and a gang led by Red Foreman
The gunfire stopped and Officer Alex Murphy went to negociate with Redd so he doesn't kill the hostages he has. Redd at first looked like he was willing to neogiciate but then he and his gang started shooting murphy down with shotguns and mutilated him Robocop style. I felt like I had to stop it, but I wasn't gonna go into the shoot out... so I just at there, eating the coffee cake I had in my car.
eventually snipers took redd's gang out and we all went on with our day. Then I went to stumps house, which was weird cause I saw people I go to Med School with at his house. I went to his basement only to find a stash of gay porn which was weird. I went to the kitchen and made a sandwich and went to watch TV. For some reason, the med school people were watching home made videos of them waving at the camera... it was crap.
I woke up
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Saturday, June 19, 2010
6/18/2010 Frazza's Grandfather
I was leaving Tony's house and saw Tom's car. I put my face on his window to be a dick and start making faces. Then I see Frazza in front of Tony's steps and I tell him to quit being a bitch and come back to life. He says that he's been trying. Then out of nowhere Frazza's grandfather (My mind made him up, I have no idea what he looks like) comes and says "And bring back your brother and father."
I say "If you bring back your father, I'm gonna kill him"
his grandfather said "But he's a fruit principle"
I say "He wasn't a quire principle"
his grandfather says "Not a FRUIT principle, he was a principle of fruit"
me "What the fuck does that mean"
frazza "I am not gonna bring back my dad"
grandfather "But he's a fruit principle"
Tony runs out "What the fuck is going on here"
me "Frazza's dad was a fruit principle"
Tony "I guess he was gay, but he wasn't a principle"
Grandfather "NO A PRINCIPLE OF FRUIT"
Tony shakes his head in confusion blurting out "No.. no no no, this cant happen here, get the fuck out of here" and kicks frazza's grandfather out.
I wake up
I say "If you bring back your father, I'm gonna kill him"
his grandfather said "But he's a fruit principle"
I say "He wasn't a quire principle"
his grandfather says "Not a FRUIT principle, he was a principle of fruit"
me "What the fuck does that mean"
frazza "I am not gonna bring back my dad"
grandfather "But he's a fruit principle"
Tony runs out "What the fuck is going on here"
me "Frazza's dad was a fruit principle"
Tony "I guess he was gay, but he wasn't a principle"
Grandfather "NO A PRINCIPLE OF FRUIT"
Tony shakes his head in confusion blurting out "No.. no no no, this cant happen here, get the fuck out of here" and kicks frazza's grandfather out.
I wake up
6/18/2010 FRIENDS + medicaid
6/18/2010 FRIENDS + medicaid
Today I had a dream that I had a private practice clinic with 6 partners. The partners were the cast of the hit TV show FRIENDS. We were all double and triple billing our patients medicare/medicaid/HPO for money. We got caught and the cops showed up to our practice. We had an escape route leading to some trees where we had cars and an open area to drive onto the road on the other side. We went in 3 groups of 2. Lisa Kudrow was in my car. We went to shoprite to pick up some things for the roadtrip to mexico. We were practicing in San Diego to give you a general idea and yes I know there aren't shoprites in san Diego.
We hooked up in the shoprite bathroom and a cop spotted us in the parking lot. We booked it and lost him in a PNC bank parking lot where i ripped the license plate off another car and replaced ours. Lisa gave me a crew cut with the hairtrimmer we bought at shoprite. We made it to a random used car dealership where we bought a 74 GTO Cash.
We made it to new mexico before my alarm went off and woke me up... I think we would've made it
Today I had a dream that I had a private practice clinic with 6 partners. The partners were the cast of the hit TV show FRIENDS. We were all double and triple billing our patients medicare/medicaid/HPO for money. We got caught and the cops showed up to our practice. We had an escape route leading to some trees where we had cars and an open area to drive onto the road on the other side. We went in 3 groups of 2. Lisa Kudrow was in my car. We went to shoprite to pick up some things for the roadtrip to mexico. We were practicing in San Diego to give you a general idea and yes I know there aren't shoprites in san Diego.
We hooked up in the shoprite bathroom and a cop spotted us in the parking lot. We booked it and lost him in a PNC bank parking lot where i ripped the license plate off another car and replaced ours. Lisa gave me a crew cut with the hairtrimmer we bought at shoprite. We made it to a random used car dealership where we bought a 74 GTO Cash.
We made it to new mexico before my alarm went off and woke me up... I think we would've made it
12/8/09 Polar Bear
tell this to your psych doctor
i got caught witnessing a murder in a building so I start running thinking i'll just jump out an open window but a referree throws a flag and says HOLDING and makes me start the run over from 10 yards back so now i gotta run faster to pass the defenders coming from the other parts of the hall. I jump out the window and Puff Daddy set up a trampoline outside to catch me. I noticed a white mass in the bushes. This guy comes at me in a polar bear costume.. I suplex the bear and the head comes off, it's brian lapierre. He comes at me again, and I suplex him again. He's on the ground and i hear a growl, i look over, it's a polar bear charging at us from a block away. I piledrive lapierre and leave him as unconscious bate for the bear as I run into a house. The house turns out to be a family reunion where i fix my cousin's cabinet
i got caught witnessing a murder in a building so I start running thinking i'll just jump out an open window but a referree throws a flag and says HOLDING and makes me start the run over from 10 yards back so now i gotta run faster to pass the defenders coming from the other parts of the hall. I jump out the window and Puff Daddy set up a trampoline outside to catch me. I noticed a white mass in the bushes. This guy comes at me in a polar bear costume.. I suplex the bear and the head comes off, it's brian lapierre. He comes at me again, and I suplex him again. He's on the ground and i hear a growl, i look over, it's a polar bear charging at us from a block away. I piledrive lapierre and leave him as unconscious bate for the bear as I run into a house. The house turns out to be a family reunion where i fix my cousin's cabinet
5/25/09 Broddrick and Football
first i kicked my father out of the house cause he tried to kick my brother out after thinkin he let a 17 year old girl (girl who's really 25 and i almost hooked up with running for a ms america or some pagent or some shit on TV) smoke. Then on my way to work i had to call out cause i got food poisoning. So they sent someone to follow me to my house and find out if i was lying cause they thought i was a psycho
urnuttynut (9:11:50 AM): then i turned into matthew bodderick and was a supreme court judge
urnuttynut (9:15:33 AM): and some guy walks into my house and i see him wondering why my couches arent facing the TV. I knew why he was there as i had a gun in my back pocket. He told me that if i dont sign this form (letter of resignation) with the name "Savereese" (my OMM book's author), couple people are gonna come here to "take care of me." So i pulled out the gun and told him to tell them to come. He goes "You'll be sentenced to prison for life if you kill all of them" and i said as matthew brodderik "I am the court, that wont happen" and i went to my attic and waited for a hummer and when 5 guys walked out armed, i ended it in 10 seconds with a rifle like machine gun.
urnuttynut (9:17:10 AM): THEN i woke up to take a piss and went back to sleep where this little fat doctor guy named Dr. Scott was coaching me out to play football cause I was gonna be Ed Reed's replacement, that turned into playing paddle ball 2 on 2 with Dr. Scott and Ryan Reynolds vs me and Canzano but the ball was like those supersmall really bouncy balls. And we played tennis style ina closed room, no hit against the wall, we hit it at eachother
urnuttynut (9:11:50 AM): then i turned into matthew bodderick and was a supreme court judge
urnuttynut (9:15:33 AM): and some guy walks into my house and i see him wondering why my couches arent facing the TV. I knew why he was there as i had a gun in my back pocket. He told me that if i dont sign this form (letter of resignation) with the name "Savereese" (my OMM book's author), couple people are gonna come here to "take care of me." So i pulled out the gun and told him to tell them to come. He goes "You'll be sentenced to prison for life if you kill all of them" and i said as matthew brodderik "I am the court, that wont happen" and i went to my attic and waited for a hummer and when 5 guys walked out armed, i ended it in 10 seconds with a rifle like machine gun.
urnuttynut (9:17:10 AM): THEN i woke up to take a piss and went back to sleep where this little fat doctor guy named Dr. Scott was coaching me out to play football cause I was gonna be Ed Reed's replacement, that turned into playing paddle ball 2 on 2 with Dr. Scott and Ryan Reynolds vs me and Canzano but the ball was like those supersmall really bouncy balls. And we played tennis style ina closed room, no hit against the wall, we hit it at eachother
5/19/09 Yao Electra Zohan Hewitt
i had a dream where me ushir tom went to a basketball court where they charged us 9$ an hour to play
and when we paid all these naked chicks came
lead by carmen electra
yea and then for some reason after doing them, everyone else ignored us completely
and then i went upstairs and then yao ming punched me
cause apparently carmen electra was his girl
so i took a chair and hit him in the head and took his clothes so he was only in tighty whities and ran into the bathroom
tony is outside tryint to cheer yao up so once i see it, i break for the elevator and for to the first floor and you ca n clearly hear the conversation between toni and yao
so when yao got on an elevator, i went up to the roof and threw his clothes there
where adam sandler tries to tackle me, (he's zohan), he missed, and then yao comes and i back body drop him off the roof, sandler jumps off with a rope and lassos him as he grows sabretooth claws and slows his momentum down via the wall
so i jumped connected to a rope to drop a leg but the rope was too short so it whipped me into someone's balcony
turns out it happened to be jennifer love hewitt and topanga
and they were looking for a threesome, tap that
then JLH was giving me a ride home froma basketball court turned hotel... i dont know
and then i realized we're about to be attacked, i dont know how, i saw that corny movie next and maybe it stuck in my head so i jumped, then she takes the top of her truck off and it's a fucking chain gun
she starts it and spins it, bullets fly everywhere
and i woke up
and when we paid all these naked chicks came
lead by carmen electra
yea and then for some reason after doing them, everyone else ignored us completely
and then i went upstairs and then yao ming punched me
cause apparently carmen electra was his girl
so i took a chair and hit him in the head and took his clothes so he was only in tighty whities and ran into the bathroom
tony is outside tryint to cheer yao up so once i see it, i break for the elevator and for to the first floor and you ca n clearly hear the conversation between toni and yao
so when yao got on an elevator, i went up to the roof and threw his clothes there
where adam sandler tries to tackle me, (he's zohan), he missed, and then yao comes and i back body drop him off the roof, sandler jumps off with a rope and lassos him as he grows sabretooth claws and slows his momentum down via the wall
so i jumped connected to a rope to drop a leg but the rope was too short so it whipped me into someone's balcony
turns out it happened to be jennifer love hewitt and topanga
and they were looking for a threesome, tap that
then JLH was giving me a ride home froma basketball court turned hotel... i dont know
and then i realized we're about to be attacked, i dont know how, i saw that corny movie next and maybe it stuck in my head so i jumped, then she takes the top of her truck off and it's a fucking chain gun
she starts it and spins it, bullets fly everywhere
and i woke up
3/3/09 Fake Black Cop
I’m at the mall with ushir and toni and we’re walking and I see these group of these Chinese girls who were flashing their friends taking pictures so I thought it’d be a good idea to approach them. On my way I walk into a bunch of Indian girls and start talking to them. They grabbed my hand and started walking and then one of their boyfriends shows up and it turns out Ushir hates him so he slapped him. The guy started running, I get the girl’s # and we start chasing him. And some how harris sean and tom end up joining us and next thing I know we’re chasing the guy through a park and he jumps through this jungle gym maze and then by the park exit, I caught him, spun him and buried his head into the dirt. Ushir got there and started kicking him and Tom threw a boulder on his knee. Then we realized we lost harris at the jungle gym. We go back and we find him there crying cause he’s afraid of sliding down the 5 foot poll to come down. Toni says “It’s ok harris. You can do it, you wont break your leg. I promise.” Ushir says “You’re a fucking fireman, how can you not slide down a short poll.” Harris crying yells “Stop yelling at me” Toni says “Ignore him, you can do it, just try” Harris “NO!”
I say “Harris…. There is a slide right next to you” Harris comes down
we were all at dunkin donuts and i went to get food while the guys decided to walk to Toni's place
so i get in my car and turn it on and this black cop comes in front of my car and tells me to get out. I get out and take my keys with me. I see this white guy goes into the passenger seat and the cop tried to take my keys. I noticed his outfit didn't fit him, his gun looked like a toy and his badge looked plastic. I realized I was being robbed. i get into teh car and the white guy points one a fake gun at me and says "Get out of the car"
So in retaliation I cleverly say "You get out of the car". then this other car comes pulls over next to me to block me. These guys start screaming at me to get out of the car. Now i'm clearly out numbered. I start talkin shit back and once i see the car in front of me go, i punched the guy next to me in the nose, but then the black guy cop jumped into the car via the moon roof and i floored it. 2 blocks of zig zagg and i pull over right next to my friends who were walking towards Tony's and say "Hey, these assholes are tryin to steal my car."
we kicked teh shit out of 2 of them and the other 2 ended up dead
then i ate my sandwich
I say “Harris…. There is a slide right next to you” Harris comes down
we were all at dunkin donuts and i went to get food while the guys decided to walk to Toni's place
so i get in my car and turn it on and this black cop comes in front of my car and tells me to get out. I get out and take my keys with me. I see this white guy goes into the passenger seat and the cop tried to take my keys. I noticed his outfit didn't fit him, his gun looked like a toy and his badge looked plastic. I realized I was being robbed. i get into teh car and the white guy points one a fake gun at me and says "Get out of the car"
So in retaliation I cleverly say "You get out of the car". then this other car comes pulls over next to me to block me. These guys start screaming at me to get out of the car. Now i'm clearly out numbered. I start talkin shit back and once i see the car in front of me go, i punched the guy next to me in the nose, but then the black guy cop jumped into the car via the moon roof and i floored it. 2 blocks of zig zagg and i pull over right next to my friends who were walking towards Tony's and say "Hey, these assholes are tryin to steal my car."
we kicked teh shit out of 2 of them and the other 2 ended up dead
then i ate my sandwich
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